Yesterday morning I was low… very low.
But it always takes that ONE friend to slap you back into reality, and yesterday, that is exactly what happened.
My friend Yvette (who helped me with weight loss before) called me yesterday morning after reading my blog. She gave me a dose of reality, and several words of wisdom.
“Your body is controlling you, you are not controlling your body!”
“You really have to slap the shit out of your body so it can listen to you!”
“BACK TO THE BASICS!!!!!!!!”
“Tell your body, sorry, THIS is what we are doing now!”
(Seriously, this conversation was so GREAT that I was taking notes! I felt like I was attending a motivational conference or something!)
But HONESTLY, SERIOUSLY… Right now, my weight defines me. I am controlled by food – whether it is the food I am eating, or not eating, or just obsessing about. Something’s gotta give!
I am going to rise up. I am not going to do this to myself anymore. My weight will not define me anymore.
No, I do NOT want to diet. I do not want to count calories. I do not want to restrict my sugar and caffeine. I really just want to eat healthy foods 80% of the time see where that leads me.
But right now, I am miserable in my skin. I am unhappy.
Uncomfortable. I am going to have to get uncomfortable for a while. Why? Because being uncomfortable in regards to following a diet and exercise plan will only be temporary. Staying on the track that I am on is going to kill me. For real.
I saw my mother today. 5’2” and 300+ lbs. She is 75 years old, and takes 14 different medications to control severe arthritis, type 2 diabetes, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, and a list of other weight-related ailments. I do not want to turn into my mother (who, by the way, refuses to diet and sleeps with a box of cookies and sweets in her bed with her).
I have issues with food that I am going to have to address… head on. What am I gonna do when I want food? What am I gonna do to break my bad habits? I have to figure that out. Starting now.
Yesterday, the sun came out. I took my children to the Dollar Store – even though we really didn’t need anything. It was close to the house and I didn’t want to travel too far because of the flooding. But we needed to get out of the house. I needed fresh air.
I bought some yard supplies, and spent two hours working in my yard yesterday. I strapped on my HRM – I burned 1400 calories mowing the back yard and cutting hedges and weeding! Today, my body is HURTING – but in a good way! I am ready to start exercising again. The sun is out, so I will be walking today.
And coming up with a plan so I can FINALLY start losing weight again. Even if it makes me UNCOMFORTABLE. I have to do this. Now.